Responding to my Spam

Got a piece of SPAM for SEO services.  I'm in a snarky mood so there are a couple of things in the email to make fun of.

Dear Team,

Team? I guess that include Frosty, the Cat and Harley, the Dalek made of motorcycle parts.  Hey GUYS! we're a team!!!!

bowtiesarecool team team. Camera Shy: Harley The Dalek


Take a break from your busy schedule and give attention towards Organic search engine traffic for Don’t you think to start a fresh and better internet campaign? Yes, you must be interested to drag revenue by putting your website top in search engines.

Thief Bag of Money
Me, Dragging some revenue

How do you drag revenue?  Do I get one of those bags with a dollar sign that thieves use in cartoons and drag it behind me?  Or do I have to be in drag in order to get the revenue?

We found some major factors – You need to focus.

You need to focus.  You are getting sleepy... cluck like a chicken.

Deprived website content.

Yes, I'm guilty.  I deprive my content.  I have locked my content in the cupboard under the stairs for years.  I don't feed it.  I beat it. I poke it with a sharp stick.

Stumpy image optimization.

Stumpy the Pirate

I've been a technologist for over 30 years.  Web developer for over 10 years.  I'm a photographer.  I do my fair share of image editing and manipulating.  I have no idea what makes an image "stumpy".  Perhaps arms and legs are getting cut off and leaving stumps in their place.

Inappropriate Social Media campaign

I knew those images of me in a speedo would backfire on me.

PSI:  I am not spamming. I have studied your website and believe I can help with your business promotion. If you still want us to not contact you, you can ignore this email or ask to remove and I will not contact again.

  1. Yes, you are spamming
  2. You studied my website so much that you missed that it's a personal blog and not a business
  3. Thank you, I will be ignoring this email

PS II: I found your site using Google search and after having a look over your website I recommend you to implement future technologies such as HTML5 and Responsive Design to make your site more accessible in mobile phone, tablets, desktop etc.

  1. If you found my website via Google Search, then my SEO must be OK, Right.  I mean YOU FOUND ME.
  2. HTML5 and Responsive design are current technologies, not "future" ones.
  3. This site is responsive, uses HTML5 and is built on bootstrap.